What I'm Looking for

All colors bleed into one ... such a good line, and the brilliance of it perhaps to be overlooked without the help of those people in life that help you find greater significance. These days, it's down - but okay.. though my nights and morning bleed into one. I'm here - ON VACATION! doing exactly what I didn't understand. The concept of taking a break never lasted more than 24 hours before, and I'm a worker bee by nature. I'm up - though I've tried to sleep...

Sometimes I wonder why some have it easy, and some have it hard. I can't say I have it either, but in some ordinary unspectacular way I'm right in the middle. What does it mean when you've done nothing wrong, but still broken my heart? I'm not claiming that it didn't need to happen, and that more isn't necessary, but pain is something that I can feel still... I don't know if I should feel the way I do, or how much I can take before reverting to something that doesn't really express the deepest desires of my heart. I need to reason to cry, but am I justified if I do?

I go through life, and I see just how beautiful moments are where surely divinity has touched me... I can look into the sea of colors and eyes that would stare back at me to know that I have many blessings to count. Just as surely the colors will converge, and the touch of the devil turns cold... I indeed have found what I'm looking for - and I know I will never be able to hold up my end of the deal...

Snowboarding

As I fumble and fall my way down the bunnies - I realize 2 things: my boots are too big, and I'm way too heavy. I started to cook breakfast this morning for my trip-mates, and as I pulled the bacon from the package I realized - this is what my stomach would look like. - and it's gross... 2 packages produces enough liquid fat to fill a 12 oz can 1/2 way - not counting the pouring errors... Thank Goodness I didn't eat any... 

Otherwise the trip is going quite well. I noticed many differences in people: some people are technical and give instructions in a militant manner ~ easily frustrated. Some receive positive encouragement - (I try to give it, and actually saw it work!)